Tag Archives: real life

sleep

Sitting here, slumbering pooch nestled
Up warm back to base of my spine, black
Cat chittering excitedly from atop bed-
Room door, not swung wide enough to
Again knock hanging Eiffel Tower pic
From it’s single nail in the wall, old
Man Wishbone stretching as he settles,
Claws scrabbling for stretchy-purchase
On original hardwood hard-varnished floor, and
Still my aching temple does not relinquish the fact,
That not twenty-four hours ago, this self-
Same I, was wound up like coiled silver spring,
One more lost soul, caught up in the moment,
About to lose it, and all for the memory,
One clear clean frozen fraction of time,
Flooded with the warmth of memory, and
The pain of loss, this self-same man, me,
Was on the brink of being back in his
Mother’s warm smiling embrace, those
Soulful laughingly love-filled compassionate eyes,
Although a dear stranger, dear all the same,
Same down-dragging corner of mouth,
Same wicked humour glinting in eyes,
Until the puffy stroke-folded cheek,
Muscle toying with the hint of a smile,
Like an old man teasing one last curl of
The dumbbell, smiling while given muscles
Give in, she smiled at me, glad for some
Company, a friendly face. So I smiled
Back, and we chatted about the weather
And gloves, til my skinnydecaflatte arrived,
And I had no more excuses to stay, yet
I would have anyway, if the tears had not
Burned my eyes tightly shut, dry heat threatening
To burst the damns of self-inflicted self-reserve,
And chased me out of that plastic place,
Into the rain-splattered stony cathedral outside,
Where words and thoughts flooded through me,
In through my deepest soul pain, then
Back out again, until I could no more read
The words on my screen, and keep straight
Faced, and so I stood, back to nothing at all,
Silent torrents of loss, coursing down rain-
Damped cheeks, lost in my own world
Of memory and pain, wondering when I would ever see you again, mom,
Writing frozen fingers tapping the screen,
Blurred vision reading words quickly unseen
So much deep unearthment, earth movers away,

The knowledge that my mother’s love had reached through
The past, the last half-decade of years, to smile
Lovingly at me through familiar stranger’s eyes,
All rolled up together into an endless deep-breathing sigh,
Only to crash me back down, to earth, concrete and stone,
Reminding me that we are never alone, for our loved ones
Follow us, to be around when we’re down, and smile out at
Us from strangers’ eyes, to remind us of who we really are,
And of how far we’ve come, that as long as we haven’t given
Up, then we are nowhere near done, to never give up,
Nor surrender our selves, that’s the trick of all time,
No matter how old. So don’t give up, or
Give in, even if all seems to go, for your mother
May be peaking out of someone else’s eyes, just to
Say a quick hello, and how do you do, and
Fair thee well, goodnight, sweet dreams,
Let us all see what tomorrow brings.

true love

runs deep, beneath the under-
currents writhing souls in our own
true internal River Styx of the dead
and gone, past, but not forgotten,
those we love carried forever in our-
selves, our hearts and minds forever
changed, altered for the better, our
every moment touched by those who
made our hearts sing, and we stand
here, in reverent silence, remembering
how it was to hold the ones we love,
smiling through the quiet tears trailing
down inside as we feel the warmth of
their humour, spinning what can be
such a cruel world into the love for life
that they represent, for now and forever,
for that is what they are to us, whether
close to hand, or watching over every
thing we do, we know they are happy,
sharing in our joys, revelling and cheering
at our triumphs, eyes dancing as they always
did, filling our souls with that love which never ends,
true love.

to all those who have lost love,
said goodbye to the centre of their world,
watched reality crumble as they stood
powerless to stop the march of time,
let us remember our truly loved as they
want us to remember, not as sad, or
ill, tired or old, but as vibrant reminders of how
life is lived, not survived. Let us live for
them, and them through us, through our
joys and sorrows, through our memory,
through our true love.

just gone

I miss you already,
Although just gone,
Your sweet kiss a wisp,
Leaving me smiling alone,
The morning just waking,
Teddy’s poo on the floor,
Sharp tang of bleach and soap,
Take over the kitchen once more.

Your gentlest touch, cold
To touch, your twinkling eyes
Still on mine, the cats playing as
Always, and the old smelly guy’s
Still fine.

The waking house, Sky still
Sleeping, ticking clocks in my ear, stereo
Clicking away the time of the year, and yet
Still I can see you, still smiling, still mine, your
Wicked sense of humour, your gorgeous self tangled
With mine.

Peace at last,
Still inside, calm from the whirling storm,
Meteors touching down in Russia like a dream,
Sci-fi movie come true, Bible-thumpers screaming
The world’s ending too soon, while our hopes are
Still warm, our eyes up to the sky, the cats are
Still playing, Teddy growling his dissent,
Wishy whinging for love, Sky snoozing
In her room, and me thinking of you,
This is life as we know it, no surprise
It is true, and the only perfection
That we don’t already have,
Is to tie that sacred knot,
When I get to marry,
You.

Coming home

to roost, happy as
a cat who’s got the
cream, living a life
that was once a dream,
all I can say is, “I am
here, ready to take it
all, everything I have
ever held so dear, and
hold it closer than my
own true self, never to
forget the journey far,
all tears shed, muscles
torn, eager ego rumbled
hard, shaken standing up
so long, so far, still and yet
not still, no more, tapping
footsteps damp on floor, my
one true wish has already come
true, that I am he, coming home
to you, my sweetest love, whose
tenderest kiss, traces ghost circles
teasing dry-chapped lips, until
the moment of open door, with
you smiling, standing there, happy
once more, may I remind myself
dreams do come true, if you keep
on fighting, just for you, at the end
of nightmare’s forever razor-bladed
ride, where each long night sliced
deeper inside, until raw scraping
cold hard steel drew screams, of
tortured lonely shattered dreams,
measured in heart torn silent tears
once shed, of lonely empty endless
dread, now coming home to youy dear, there is nothing left that is
empty here, instead all is filled with
brightness and light, for everything
is just so, just right, and all I can say
forever from the me, is you are my
one true love, and this is my dream
life, just you and me.

a partial solution…

We don’t need to ‘ban’ guns. We just need to punish those who carry handguns by automatically applying federal law to anyone caught committing a crime while carrying a deadly weapon. What this means in reality is that anyone caught committing a crime (no matter how big or small) whilst carrying a gun (even if they did not use it in the crime) will automatically go to jail for 10 years. This was trialed in three states over two decades ago.

The outcome? Gun homicide fell by 30% in the first year. They even anonymously interviewed a cocaine dealer from the area, who was quoted in saying that all of the cocaine dealers he knew stopped carrying weapons because 10 years in jail was too costly… if they were caught with cocaine they could get up to 3 years in jail. But if they were caught with cocaine and a gun, they automatically got 10 years. With this one dealer earning over $200k a year selling drugs, 10 years in jail is a loss of $2 million which is just not sound business logic. Hence why he and other dealers stopped carrying. Hence why the gun homicides by criminals was cut so drastically so quickly. How was this kicked off?

By a slight change in state law making all people caught committing crimes while carrying a deadly weapon automatically tried in federal court instead of state court, and guaranteeing them 10 years in jail. Billboards were posted all around the areas, publicising the new application of existing laws. (I wrote a paper on this in Uni.)

So yes, there is a real solution (tried and tested) with a simple application of EXISTING federal gun laws which would focus the government’s anti-gun legislation on criminals, not your law-abiding gun owners (win-win). We could do it now.

Why does the NRA not want this? Because all the NRA cares about is selling guns to anyone and everyone. They care about making money not helping people or protecting homes. They are the face of big business.

If the ‘law-abiding’ gun owners of the US want to continue to exercise their right to bear arms, they should support real-world solutions and force the NRA to back the implementation of tighter federal law punishments for all criminals who commit crimes carrying deadly weapons. It is proven to work.

The world is not black and white (guns for everyone or guns for no one). The world is GREY. (Rules applied to punish criminals, lower gun homicides, and improve our way of life.) … I would like to point out that even if we did implement this law and cut gun homicides by 30% nationally in the first year (which would be great) we wouldn’t actually solve the problem of the massacres in the schools – the majority of which were committed by the children of people who legally own guns (‘law-abiding gun owners’).

That is obviously an issue to resolve in another manner. (Not sure how to solve that problem without limiting / minimising gun ownership across the board.)